Patching

Manual dexterity isn't exactly my forte. You're talking to a man whose hand/eye coordination has doomed him to loose every ping-pong game he will ever play with his (younger) brother, even in some inverted universe where everybody has little goatees. My patience is also notoriously short. Back when I gave a shit about basketball (for reasons that somehow escape me now), family legend has it that I broke a remote control throwing it at Shaquile O'Neal's head (this is actually more common than you'd think among Sacramento Kings fans).

All of these things suggest that I would make a terrible sewer. At least, that's what I assumed, until I tried my hand at patching up my favorite pair of jeans. Fortunately, it seems that somewhere beneath this clumsy exterior of a likely natural-selection victim lies the steady hands and iron patience of a Navy Seals sniper that happens to be a 75-year old woman.

Ok, so I can't sew like your grandma, but I did manage to patch up my jeans (notice the finely sculpted hindquarters above). And if I can do it, pretty much anybody can. For my little project, I took a bit of denim from the inside of my back-right pocket (tip to pickpockets: I always wear my wallet on my left-side), pinned it to the hole (which I had cut out more or less neatly from the hanging tear), and sewed. When I had made stitches all around the patch, I ran a couple of small stitches over my last stitch, and tied the two ends of my string together with several slip-knots. Now, instead of seeing my beautiful green boxers, people will just think that I'm wearing black ones!

Since my powers of description are a little lacking, I've included this link to let you see how a pro does it. Or at least someone whose hands aren't malformed clubs like mine (hey, we can't all be perfect).

Jean Patching Guide

Edible Plants: Nasturtium

I've been finding edible plants all around my apartment here in Berkeley. Miner's lettuce, wild onion, and nasturtium are all rampant in the street planters and up in the hills; just take a bag with you when you're walking and you'll have a nice salad for dinner! Here are some links to give you an idea what to look for (plus my own "identification guide" up top):
-Miner's Lettuce (I like the story about the ant hills and the Indians; wonder if it works?)
-Wild Onion (The ones I've been finding have whiter flowers than these)
-Nasturtium

As with all edible plants, you're on your own with these. Experts (a cadre which I do not pretend to belong to) recommend you check three different guides before eating any wild plants. That said, I think these three plants are some of the easiest to find and identify; have fun storming the castle!

Rage Against The Machine: Wheel Wars

In my history as a bicyclist, I've hit two cars. No, they didn't run into me, I decided to take bring the fight to the home front and ran smack dab into them.

Now, before you begin writing folk songs about how Alec fought the machine and lived to tell the tale, let me clarify that both of these cases were classic examples of me being a dumb ass. Both times I was going too fast with worn out breaks and fully immersed in my typical guinea pig-level consciousness. In both instances, I was lucky enough to cause no damage to myself or the other person's automobile, and didn't run into a seven foot former felon.

So bicyclists can be dicks, too. We can be "slow" (fifteen miles an hour seems fast enough to myself, but then again, I'm somewhat dubious on this whole "combustion engine" idea, so you have to compensate for the wingnut factor), we can take up the lane for no apparent reason, and sometimes we can just be plain stupid.

Deal with it.

Bicyclists can cause serious accidents, but they are by far the most vulnerable party on the road that abides by the same rules that motorists follow. We choose to spend our recreational time and commute in a manner that respects our bodies and contributes to a cleaner community. No matter what your opinion is on anthropocentric (human-caused) climate change, the negative impacts of smog and other pollutants that result from automobile use are undeniable. In addition, bicycles make for a safer driving experience. They cause less congestion, travel at a slower pace, and allow for greater awareness due to their open design; all of which helps prevent accidents.

Automobiles have a variety of uses. They are ideal for mid-range travel between cities not covered by adequate intercity mass transit, integral to the distribution of necessary goods to many semi-remote locals, and essential for quick emergency services. But automobilists have to recognize that they share the road with other users. My experiences in the city have shown that most drivers are very respectful to bicyclists and even go out of their way to accommodate them. However, to those of you that constitute the exception, grow up and try a bike. Maybe you'll find your road rage channeled into something more productive, like charging up the next hill or doing some jumps off curbs.

FutureFright: The Good, The Bad, and the Internet

The digital world. It's all around us, primarily because it's what we're both in right now (you are reading a blog, right?). Like Casper, the internet is a friendly ghost that's around for adventures when you need it, but leaves few traces on the material world (aside from slime, a la Ghostbusters). However, the digital world is founded not upon magical tidbits of ghostly love from an ancient cult headed by Gozar, but computer servers, which create more heat than a cockerspaniel on her rut. Not only consuming energy to be powered, these servers have to be cooled, purportedly consuming as much energy as it takes to boil a kettle of water over the course of two Google searches. It's enough to make a Luddite like myself consider going back to print.

But hold on there, my unhappy stone-aged camper! Compared to reading the traditional print version of the New York Times, a PDA user reading the same content sourced from the internet uses around 2-3% of the energy, according to a UC Berkeley study. It makes logical sense; the amount of resources required to create and distribute most traditional media are extravagant compared to the energy required to make and run the computers which you and the server farms use. That said, it is a good call to awareness for IT companies to develop more efficient electronics and for users to spend less time on YouTube and more time enjoying...well, whatever there is outside the internet. Just do a Google search to find out (and don't worry too much about that boiling water).

Retro Reboot: The Sims (Original!)

"This grow is frenshnay!"

Words of wisdom from our Sim brethren. Yes, yours truly was once a devoted video gamer back in that netherworld of the late 90s/early 00s, and yes, I did adore the virtual voyeurism that we know and love as The Sims. While the series has gone through more expansion packs than there are Byzantine dynasties and has since bequeathed an updated sequel (with the innovative title of The Sims 2), the original Sims has surprising staying power. With the entire hoard of old video games that I have laying around unvanquished and forgotten it will be years before I need to buy a new game. Plus, running only old games, even my first generation MacBook Pro looks like...well, a pro. Ah, the benefits of flipping the bird to the obsolescence curve.

FutureFright: The Electric Car

As both a neo-luddite and a pseudo-environmentalist, it's difficult to discern where I should stand on certain issues. Case in point: the electric car. Sure, it promises to replace the pollution-spewing combustion engine with a more efficient and (at least not directly) polluting electric one, but what secrets is it hiding? The question of where the power sow for this fleet of suckling electric piglets will come from, not to mention issues surrounding the material required to make these cars in the first place (particularly in regards to the battery) makes me wonder about their wisdom. Plus, I totally can't hear them when I'm out on a run.

To make me feel a bit better, here's an awesome video of some Norwegians trying this little Think! car out. Mostly, look for how funny the Norwegians are. Also note the discussion of the Think! car's capabilities as a bower of love at 3:00, the explanation of its safety features at 3:30 ("you would think, 'oh, if I crash I will die'": they address the concerns, at least of my grandmother), and it doing doughnuts in the snow at 6:00. If the future has to look like that, well...I'll think about it.

Trashcapades: Dumpster Diving Food Porn

Ah, chicken soup for the dumpster diver's soul. This blog has some drool-worthy photos of freegan excursions in an unnamed city. As anyone that has found a good dumpster knows, nirvana is possible in these miniature Shangri-las filled with bread, pastries, and veggies.